I have a confession to make: I just don't love Willow anymore. I know that I'm supposed to - and at one time, I really did - but somewhere along the way, I lost the love. Actually, I know exactly when it started to fade, and sad to say, it was way back in the beginning of Season Three.

When Buffy came back from Los Angeles, Willow treated her horribly. To be fair, Willow had every right to feel abandoned and angry when her best friend left so suddenly and without a word. But a best friend should also realize that what Buffy went through was so much worse and try to be supportive. The problem was, when she finally dropped the cold shoulder act, Willow went not into support-mode but into "I'm the boss of you" mode, meddling and instructing without any regard for Buffy's feelings. Buffy kind of liked Scott, but she made it clear that Angel was still too fresh, too painful for her even to consider starting a new relationship. So what did Willow do? Decided that she knew better and played matchmaker, forcing the issue Buffy specifically said she wasn't ready to deal with. No surprise, then, that it went so badly.

Willow also saw clearly that Buffy was having trouble adjusting to having Faith around. Faith's attitude made Buffy uncomfortable, and she resented Faith suddenly being everywhere in her life. So what did Willow do? Instruct Buffy to take Faith home for dinner. Not by mentioning it might be nice, not by suggesting the Slayers might want to get to know each other better, but by nudging Buffy the same way a parent reminds a negligent child to thank Grandma for the birthday present. Because Willow knows best, right? No, Willow, you don't.

Not content with bossing Buffy around, Willow also found the time to break Oz's heart. A huge fan of Willow from Seasons 1 & 2, I used to really hope she and Xander would get together. So naturally, Joss decided to let the sparks fly at the worst possible time. Because that's what Joss does, and good on him for it. But with Willow's attitude already irritating me, seeing her carrying on behind Oz's back didn't exactly do wonders for my opinion of her. She was still endearing and plucky and insecure and funny and most of the things I used to love her so much for, but when the bossiness and infidelity crept in, I just didn't love her the way I used to.

After Buffy was forcibly resurrected, I was sad to see Joyce's room occupied, but I understood. What bothered me immensely, though, was Buffy's relentless financial trouble, which was exacerbated by the fact that Joyce's life insurance was practically gone by the time Buffy returned. Excuse me? I know they said a large portion of it went to pay Joyce's medical bills, but they seem to have glossed over the part where Willow decided that she could move in and spend the rest of it without lifting a finger to contribute financially. Apparently determined to bring Buffy back, I guess Willow just decided to leave things like basic financial responsibility for her friend to worry about when she was done being dead. Even seeing the problems Buffy was having with this, Willow never even seemed to consider that maybe, as an adult living under the same roof, she ought to at least pitch in for some freaking groceries. Nope, Willow had school to go to. Buffy? Hell, she just needed to keep the world safe and all. And why should Willow do something silly like lighten her course load and get a part-time job? After all, Buffy seemed to be handling everything so well, right? Sheesh. So Buffy knocks herself out working double-shifts at Greasy Meat Hell to pay the bills and take care of the house so that Willow can go Bronze it up with Dawn at night. Perfectly fair.

For the past few seasons, Willow's recklessness with magick has continually irritated me. Smart enough to know better, she continued to charge headfirst into spells without thinking, despite repeatedly endangering and hurting the people she cared about. Oh, yeah, and there was that little thing about abusing Tara, lying and using mind control to make Tara forget legitimate concerns and get back to snuggling. Willow knew she was hurting people, but even after countless lessons about why she needed to stop and think before using spells, she continued to look for the quick fix, still insisting she knew what was best for everyone. This trend of course continued through Season Six, and I still don't think it's been sufficiently resolved in S7. One minute, she's "Oh, I can't risk it!" but then the next, she's all "Hey, I'll just do a quick spell..." Which is it, Willow? Just as she's done for years, she seems to want to have her cake and eat it too.

So Willow tried to destroy the world and got welcomed back with open arms. Hesitant arms, sure, but as soon as the gang saw Willow again, it seemed all was forgiven. Um, quick trip back to S3. Buffy loves Angel more than anything in the world, she has to run him through with a sword to send him to hell, and they're miffed that she needed some time alone to deal. Willow attacks them all, individually and with murderous intent, but when she gets back, heck, they're just glad their buddy's home, and not even Dawn seems to want at least an apology. Once again, so very fair. And when Amy explained her reasons for hexing Willow in "Killer In Me" I just kept thinking, "Word, Amy. Preach it."

It's to Alyson's credit that I still have as much affection for Willow as I do. All I have to see is a slight look of sadness, and I instantly want Willow to be okay. But that's got everything to do with Aly's fantastic acting ability and little to do with the way I feel about the woman Willow has become. On a show that's in its seventh season, it's natural for characters to have changed since we met them. Character development is a good thing. But going back to watch early episodes, I find myself missing the old Willow more and more. Every so often, I see a flash of the girl I used to love so much. But after the last few seasons, that love's just not what is used to be.

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