Girl 1: The new kid? She seems kind of weird to me. What kind of a name is Buffy?
Girl 2: Hey, Aphrodesia!
Girl 1: Oh, hey!

Buffy: Why don't we start with 'Hi, I'm Buffy', and then let's segue directly into me asking you for a favor. It doesn't involve moving, but it does involve hanging out with me for a while.
Willow: But aren't you hanging out with Cordelia?
Buffy: I can't do both?
Willow: Not legally.

Willow: Buffy, this is Jesse, and that's Xander.
Xander: Oh, Buffy and me go way back. Old friends, very close. Then we had that period of estrangement where I think we were both growing as people, but now here we are like old times - I'm quite moved.
Jesse: Is it me, or are you turning into a bibbling idiot?
Xander: No, it's uh, it's not you.

Jesse: Yeah, you know, we wanted to welcome you, make you feel at home. Unless you have a scary home.

Cordelia: I don't mean to interrupt your downward mobility, but I just wanted to tell you that you won't be meeting Coach Foster, the woman with the chest hair, because gym was cancelled due to the extreme dead guy in the locker.

Joyce: Are you going out tonight?
Buffy: Yeah, I'm going to a club.
Joyce: Will there be boys there?
Buffy: No, Mom, it's a nun club.

Giles: You have to hone your senses. Focus until the energy washes over you, until you feel every particle of--
Buffy: There's one.
Giles: Where?
Buffy: Right there, talking to that girl.
Giles: You don't know--
Buffy: Oh, please! Look at that jacket. He's got the sleeves rolled up! And the shirt? Deal with that outfit for a moment.
Giles: It's dated?
Buffy: It's carbon-dated. Trust me, only a guy living underground for the last 10 years would think that was still the look.
Giles: But you didn't... hone.

Buffy: Cordelia!
Cordy: God! What is your childhood trauma?!
Buffy: Have you guys seen Willow? Did she come by here?
Cordy: Why, do you need to attack her with a stick? Jeez!
[Buffy walks away]
Cordy: Excuse me. I have to call everyone I have ever met. Right now.

Buffy: Okay, first of all, what's with the outfit? Live in the now, okay? You look like DeBarge!

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