Selfless

Xander: I'm a strong, successful male who's giddy at the thought of all the women I will no doubt be dating in the near future.
Buffy: Strong, successful males say 'giddy'?

Olaf: Oh! They are wretched creatures indeed. The mere thought of them makes me bend at the knee and flex.

Olaf: You speak your mind and are annoying. It's one of the things I love most about you.

Olaf: Bah! I've told you a thousand times, I have no interest in this Rannevig. Her hips are large and load-bearing, like a Baltic woman. Your hips are narrow, like a Baltic woman from a slightly more arid region.

Spike: She'd see showers... she'd see stars... Now I see her.

Prof: What am I gonna say? 'No, I don't want my best student back in my class'? Well, of course I noticed that drop-off in your grades at midterms last year, and I was concerned...
Willow: Yeah, that was...
Prof: But then, voila. You turned it around and aced all your finals like, boom, magic.
Willow: Yeah, similar to, but...

Willow: For god's sake, shut your whimpering mouth!

Villager 1: Run! Hide your babies and your beadwork!
Olaf: Stop! Stop! It is Olaf!
Villager 2: The troll is doing an Olaf impersonation!
Olaf: I am Olaf!
Villager 3: Hit him with various fruits and meats!

D'Hoffryn: What'd he do?
Aud: Bar matron. A load-bearing bar matron.
D'Hoffryn: Is there any other kind?

Olaf: Come here tiny man. You are small and toylike.

Aud: What would I have to do?
D'Hoffryn: What you do best. Help wronged women punish evil men.
Aud: Vengeance.
D'Hoffryn: But only to those who deserve it.
Aud: They all deserve it.
D'Hoffryn: That's where I was going with that, yeah.

Buffy: Ripped out the heart? My god. Hey, did you get that physics class you wanted?

Buffy: The heart's completely ripped out. This is our guy.
Xander: Or a copycat spider demon.

Xander: This isn't new ground for us. When our friends go all crazy and start killing people, we help them!
Willow: Sitting right here!

Xander: If you knew what I felt-
Buffy: I killed Angel. Do you even remember that? I would have given up everything I had to be with him. I loved him more than I will ever love anything in this life, and I put a sword through his heart because I had to.
Willow: And that all worked out okay.
Buffy: You remember cheering me on? Both of you. Do you remember giving me Willow's message? "Kick his ass"?
Willow: I never said that...

D'Hoffryn: Behold D'Hoffryn, Lord of Arashmahar! He that turns the air to blood and rains d-... Miss Rosenberg, how lovely to see you again. Have you done something with your hair?
Willow: Hello, D'Hoffryn.
D'Hoffryn: I figured I'd be hearing from you soon. The flaying of Warren Mears? Oh, truly inspired. That was some water cooler vengeance - Lloyd has a sketch of it on his wall.

Xander: I want to help you.
Anya: Everyone is so considerate today. I should have slaughtered people weeks ago.

Xander: Did everybody have their crazy flakes today?!

Anya: This is getting to be a pattern with you, Buffy. Are there any friends of yours left you haven't tried to kill?

Buffy: Anya, I'm sorry.
Anya: You're apologizing to me? What fight are you watching?

[singing]
David and Marti: Oh, no!
David: Mustard on my shirt...
Marti: Mustard! I'll never get it out.
David: My favourite red shirt.
Marti: Dry clean it.
David: How could you serve...
Both: Mustard!

Anya: [singing] Mrs. Anya Lameass Made-up Maiden Name Harris...

Anya: I'd forgotten how much swords through the chest hurt.

D'Hoffryn: Oh, breathtaking! It's like somebody slaughtered an Abercrombie and Fitch calalog.

D'Hoffryn: Isn't that just like a Slayer? Solving all her problems by sticking things with sharp objects.

[ back ]

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